Lady Questions Why 21-Year-Old Man Must Speak for Mother During Sister’s Marriage Process
A Nigerian lady has sparked debate online after questioning a traditional practice that reportedly required a 21-year-old man to represent his family during discussions concerning his sister’s marriage.
According to the woman, the incident was shared on Instagram by a man who accompanied his friend to the family of a woman he intended to marry.
She said the man and his friend met the woman’s widowed mother but were allegedly asked to wait for her son, who was expected to act as the “man of the house” and speak on behalf of the family.
The situation did not sit well with the lady, who questioned why the mother, despite raising and providing for her children after the death of her husband, could not participate directly in discussions about her daughter’s marriage.
“This woman paid the school fees of her kids and catered for them because their dad is late, and all of a sudden, she doesn’t have a mouth or a say in the marriage of her daughter. She has to wait for her son, who is 21 years old, to come and interface on behalf of the family. How does that make sense?” she asked.
She argued that such traditions could diminish the role of women in important family matters, particularly when the woman in question is the parent who raised the children.
“There is no reason on earth why a parent, a mom, should not be able to speak to her visitors that came to marry her daughter. What kind of tradition are we practising?” she added.
The lady maintained that the widow should have a voice in decisions concerning her daughter’s marriage and questioned customs that place men above women in family affairs.
“There is no reason why things like this should ever have to happen in the first place,” she said.
Her comments have since generated mixed reactions online, with some Nigerians agreeing that mothers should have an active role in marriage discussions, while others defended the cultural practices surrounding family representation during traditional marriage negotiations.
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