- A Nigerian lady criticized Nigerian men abroad for their negative attitudes towards women who delay marriage decisions.
- She shared a specific incident where a man paid his partner’s bride price, became intimate, and then requested a refund of the payment after returning abroad.
- The situation highlights issues of trust and respect in relationships, particularly regarding marriage commitments.
A Nigerian lady has criticized some Nigerian men living abroad over what she described as a hurtful attitude towards women who take their time before agreeing to marry them.
The woman spoke out after recounting an alleged situation involving a man who reportedly travelled to his partner’s village, paid her bride price and subsequently became intimate with her, only to allegedly ask her family to return the marriage payment shortly after he returned abroad.
In her words, she said:
“Why will you go as far as going to a girl’s village to pay her bride price, and after sleeping with her, immediately you travel back, you send a message that they should go and take the dowry back?
‘Shebi you were playing hard to get. I had to go that far to get you and sleep with you.’ Do you see that you’re a wicked person?”
The lady questioned how a man who behaves in such a manner would react if his own sister experienced a similar situation.
She stressed that women should be allowed enough time to carefully consider marriage proposals rather than being pressured into making quick decisions.
According to her, she was deeply saddened by the alleged incident, claiming that the woman involved was left emotionally devastated.
She further explained that taking time to accept a proposal should not automatically be interpreted as a woman deliberately trying to make herself difficult to get.
“A girl delaying to say yes to you does not mean she’s playing hard to get. She’s only trying to confirm that she’s not making a silly mistake.
“Please, abroad men, if you know that a girl is delaying to say yes and it is not okay with you, please move on. Don’t come and mess any girl’s life up. Wickedness dey oo,” she added.
The lady ultimately advised men who are unwilling to wait for a woman to make up her mind about marriage to simply walk away instead of proceeding with traditional marriage rites and later withdrawing from the commitment.
Her comments have drawn attention to the importance of mutual consent, patience and sincerity when making decisions about marriage.
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