By Olayinka Owolabi-Ajayi
Every day, millions of people scroll through their phones and see the same thing. Couples on romantic holidays, husbands surprising their wives with flowers, perfectly planned proposals, and love letters posted publicly for the world to see. Without even realising it, you start to wonder why your relationship doesn’t look like that? This is the quiet damage social media is doing to modern marriages.
You’re comparing your real life to someone else’s highlight reel
The couples you see online are not showing you everything. They show you the holiday, not the argument at the airport. They show you the anniversary dinner, not the weeks of tension before it. They show you the happy moments because nobody posts the difficult ones. But when you see enough of these perfect moments, your own ordinary marriage can start to feel like it isn’t enough. Your spouse didn’t write a public tribute on your anniversary. He didn’t buy surprise flowers. She didn’t post about you, and suddenly, silence feels like neglect even when it isn’t. Not many people are bold enough to post their rough and dirty moments on social media. Please do not be deceived or carried away by the so-called happy moments you see online.
Read more news
Norway to ban social media for under-16s
Reform UK faces fresh scrutiny over candidates’ social media posts
Elon Musk’s “APC” tweet sparks confusion, reactions among Nigerian social media users
Romance has become a performance
Social media has created a new and unrealistic idea of what a good spouse looks like. Grand gestures. Public declarations. Picture-perfect moments. The problem is that many couples are now performing for each other rather than simply loving each other. When the cameras are always rolling, even just on a phone, it becomes hard to just be together without thinking about how it looks. Real love is mostly quiet. It lives in small, everyday moments that nobody sees. And those moments matter far more than anything worth posting. Wisdom!!
What you can do
Remind yourself it isn’t real, at least they are not perfect most of the time. What you see online is carefully selected. No marriage is that perfect, trust me when I say so.
Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad. If certain couples leave you feeling like your relationship isn’t enough, remove them from your feed. Train your algorithm
Talk to your spouse about boundaries. Agree on what you’re comfortable sharing online and what stays private. This point is very important.
Stop measuring your marriage against others. The only question that matters is, are we good to each other? Period!!
Don’t let a phone screen tell you your love isn’t enough.
