On the Streets is a Naijaonpoint weekly series about the chaos of modern dating: from situationships and endless talking stages, to heartbreak and everything it means to be single in today’s world.
Maribel* (28) ended her eight-year relationship when she met George*. But after he moved abroad and convinced her that marrying another woman was a sacrifice for their future, their relationship unravelled.
In this episode of On the Streets, she shares how that experience changed the way she thinks about love and relationships.
I’m single. After everything I went through and invested, I’m exhausted. Right now, I’ve left my fate in God’s hands.
My first serious relationship started in 2016. Charles* and I were classmates in SS2, and we stayed together through the rest of secondary school and university.
We also attended different universities but lived in the same area, so there were times when we’d go months without seeing each other. Despite that, the first five years were great.
But by my final year, I’d grown tired of the relationship.
I think we got together before either of us had fully grown into ourselves. As we got older, we became very different people.
Charles was passionate about art, but he was also very laid-back. After graduation, he was still working at a friend’s shop and didn’t seem motivated to pursue the goals he always talked about.
I found myself constantly pushing and encouraging him. Eventually, it started feeling like I was nagging him.
That led to more arguments and fights. During these periods, he’d disappear for days without speaking to me.
By 2022, the relationship was already on its last leg. Around that time, I started texting a guy on Twitter. We never met in person.
At first, I entertained him because I was bored, but over time, feelings got involved. About four months in, Charles saw our interactions.
He was heartbroken. Even though I knew our relationship was falling apart, I still felt guilty. I begged him to forgive me, and he did.
I cut the other guy off, and we tried to keep things going for a few months. Then I met George*.
We met at church in April 2022. My friend was taking pictures of me when George walked over to start a conversation. He was handsome and very easy to talk to.
We exchanged numbers and went on a few dates. Six weeks later, he asked me to be his girlfriend.
Technically, Charles was still in the picture, but we were barely hanging by a thread. Once George asked, I officially ended things with Charles.
He was upset. He called me names and blocked me. It wasn’t how I wanted things to end, but it had to happen.
At first, it felt like everything I’d been looking for. He ticked all my boxes and we aligned on so many things, especially marriage.
I’ve always wanted to get married young, and George felt the same way.
When we met, he was already making plans to move to Switzerland. The plan was for him to go first, settle down and eventually bring me over so we could start our life together.
About eight months into the relationship, he got his visa and left Nigeria.
Honestly, it wasn’t difficult. After spending years in a long-distance relationship with Charles, I was already used to it.
We FaceTimed and texted throughout the day. He involved me in everything, and I even helped him sort out things he left behind in Nigeria.
For a while, we were solid. Then he started keeping things from me.
He became secretive.
Our first major fight was about his flatmate. I’d always assumed the flatmate was a man, and whenever I asked about him, George never corrected me.
Three months after he relocated, we were on a video call when a woman walked past in the background. That was when he casually mentioned his flatmate was actually female.
When I confronted him, he insisted he never lied because I’d never specifically asked whether the flatmate was a man or a woman. Somehow, I ended up apologising.
Looking back, that should have been my warning sign because things got worse from there.
George returned to Nigeria for Christmas in 2023, and we had a really nice time together. Then, two days before he returned to Switzerland, he told me he wanted to marry his flatmate.
That was my exact reaction.
He claimed it was purely for immigration purposes. His visa situation had become complicated, and marrying her would make it easier for him to stay in Switzerland permanently. He said it was a sacrifice for our future.
I was devastated. I left the hotel we were staying in and went straight to my friend’s place.
My friends immediately said something wasn’t right. They kept asking why the “paper marriage” had to be with the woman he already lived with rather than with a neutral person.
George had an answer for everything. He said marrying a stranger would cost more money. He said it was temporary. He said it would eventually help me relocate, too. I was deeply in love, and I believed him.
So I forgave him and went back.
At that point, everybody in my life knew about him. I’d invested so much emotionally into the relationship that walking away felt impossible. So I had to stay.
In August 2024, he married her.
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